India - week 1

a week has gone by and i think i am still in shock. so much had happened in these past 7 days that i can't begin to tell all the stories, so i will only share a few memorable moments. we spent several days in Deepahalli (about 40 min outside Bangalore) where there is a training school for the REDS boys. these are boys who have grown up in the slums, and who were making their livings by picking up trash and selling it. many of them do not have parents. they were very excited to meet us and i have learned from them how to properly eat Indian food. no silverware, right hand only, and you thumb acts as a shovel to push the food into your mouth. :) needless to say, the Americans need napkins. we also have spent some time in Hosure, visiting the slums and the tailoring center there that is set up for young women to learn this skill so that they can support themselves and their families better. they quickly attached themselves to me, maria and lupita and all of us now have henna designs on our hands and painted fingernails. one of my favorite memories was climbing a huge hill to reach the Hindu temple at the top with practically half the village coming along with us. for many, we are the first foreigners they have seen. what was really touching was when we would visit their homes and they would go on and on about how happy they were that we had come to see their house. it actually brought tears to my eyes yesterday as it seemed like such a small thing to come and sit on the floors of their one-room shacks, yet they would brag to everyone as we walked through the village that we had come to visit them.
and just in case any of you are planning to travel to India anytime soon, i have some advice that i've learned in this first week here.
advice #1: wear flip-flops to india and be prepared for dirty feet. in India, you take your shoes off before you enter anyone's home and also for the various day care centers and training centers we have been to. that, combined with the dust and dirt makes for very dirty feet. by the time i am done with the day it takes me three scrubbings to get off the multiple layers of dirt, bug spray and sunblock. even then, they are still not all that clean.
advice #2: be prepared to eat a lot of food. everytime you visit someone, they have to serve you coffee and snacks and then pester you to eat it all. we have learned to eat light lunches when we are going to be spending the afternoon visiting. :)
advice #3: this is for the ladies...if you plan to go in traditional dress (i.e. a sari) be prepared to be tucked and re-tucked at least 5 times a day. yesterday, i wore a sari that i borrowed from our leader. inevitibly, i would step on a hem or a fold would slip and i would end up with three women dragging me into a side room to re-fold and re-tuck my sari.
i can't believe that such a complicated way of dressing is an everyday event for these women. it would probably take me an hour to get a sari on and for them it is only five minutes. but it was an interesting experience to spend the day in one. the women in hosure were so excited to see me all decked out in the sari. and you can't forget the flowers in the hair and the jewelry...most indian women have earrings at the very least...many wear multiple necklaces and have nose rings & anklets...they're all about pearls and gold here...not my favorite combination but it looks good on them. anyway, by the end of the day i felt a bit like someone's play doll with all the getting dressed by other people. the guys got a taste of it too when the girls in the tailoring center decided to dress them up in dhotis (i think i spelled that wrong).
aside from all the fun things that have happened there has been some frustration culture shock. communication is quite interesting in India as they have this habit of shaking their heads when they mean "sure", "maybe", or "ok", or "give me a minute to think about it". it's often difficult to read their emotions and figure out whether they are annoyed or not. we have also discovered that "no" is rarely said here even when the answer really is "no" or "i don't know" and we have had a few schedule mishaps that have gotten the reply "it was supposed to be arranged." we're going with the flow but it can get aggravating at times. there has been some anger and sadness in the group over the conditions of some of these places that we have visited. it's hard not to get mad when you are constantly stepping over streams of sewage in these villages and seeing 7 people living in one room shacks. the pollution in the city is almost unbearable and already i have developed a sore throat from it. the fact that many of these people live their entire lives in these conditions is unthinkable for us. in America we see children as people that we care for and help them develop into adults. children here are often seen as another person to put to work for income. girls are not as valued as much as boys as they have to have dowries for their arranged marriages. many of the poor families have a majority of girls and their marriages are often postponed due to money issues. many are married by 18 but some are even younger...15, 13, 12. it is hard for me to imagine being given away in an arranged marriage at the age of 15 but here, it is normal and expected.
so, lots has happened and i have learned so much. i'm sure there will be many more adventures to come in the next four weeks. next week, we are off to the coast to visit some of the areas devastated by the tsunami. we'll end our trip with four days in Calcutta. today we're off to a wedding so i need to go get dressed.
namaste!